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Toll-free across California
Adult Line: 1-877-503-1850 | Teen Line: 1-877-923-0700
Warning Signs
Are you married to or involved with someone who:
Is jealous and possessive toward you? Decides who you can be friends
with, checks up on you and accuses you of cheating.
Tries to control
you? Gives you orders, makes all decisions, does not take your opinion
seriously and tells you what to do.
Tries to isolate
you? Puts down your friends and family, wants you all to himself/herself
and cuts you off from those who support you.
Scares you?
You are afraid of how they will react to things, of making them angry
and of disagreeing with them.
Is verbally
abusive? Calls you names, puts you down and criticizes you.
Is violent
or loses their temper quickly? Pushes or shoves you, keeps you from
leaving the room, has a history of fighting, threatens you and breaks
or throws objects.
Blames you
and others for their problems? Blames you when they mistreat you, says
you made them do it, provoked them and says that they could not help
it.
Pressures
you for sex? Is forceful or scary about sex, uses guilt or tries to
manipulate you into having sex and does not care whether you want sex
or not.
Abuses alcohol
and/or drugs?
Thinks they
have the right to be in control of you? Expects you should to be passive
and submissive.
Is OVERLY
dependent on you? Says that they can not live without you and has unrealistic
expectations of you and pressures you for commitment.
What To Do Next
Abuse is the use of or the threat to use physical, sexual or verbal behavior
to coerce a partner or to gain or maintain control in the relationship.
If you are threatened by your spouse or partner in any way:
GO SOMEWHERE SAFE. The instant a spouse or partner hits you or threatens to hit you, the minute you feel fear, get away immediately. Go to a friend or relative's house, or a battered women's shelter. Shelters will protect you whether you are married or single and help you decide what to do .
CALL THE POLICE. If your spouse or partner has hurt you or if you are afraid, you have the right to call the police. What he/she is doing is illegal whether you are married or not. In many states, the police can immediately remove him/her from the premises and arrest him/her.
GET AN ORDER OF PROTECTION. An order of protection means that the batterer is breaking the law if he/she comes after you again, and can be arrested.
View a short video of women's experiences using these links:
And call for help: 1-877-503-1850.
You Are Not Alone
Domestic violence is a crime that affects all members of
society regardless of ethnicity, culture, economic class,
educational background, age, sexual orientation or physical ability.
If you are being abused, you are not alone.
Windows Media Format (Faster; try this first)
MPEG Format (Slower, but more compatible)